Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with remorse for heartlessly eating my own twinkie and not saving it for my mom.
Sitting there, in my Hollie Hobbie dress and white laced anklet socks, with cream filling on my face, I made a terrible decision.
I waited for my opportunity.
School was almost out. Jamie was momentarily distracted. I reached my hand into my best friend Jamie's desk, and swiped her twinkie.
My mom picked me up from school and my aunt was visiting. In the car I pulled out the stolen twinkie and said in my sweetest voice,
"Here Aunt Judy. Here is the twinkie that I saved for you. Most of the kids ate theirs, but I wanted you to have mine."
A teensy twinge of guilt washed over me.
Later that night, my mom came into my room and said,
"Lori, I just want you to know how proud I am that you saved your twinkie and gave it to Aunt Judy. That was such a big girl thing to do and I'm so proud of you."
Mom had no idea that her big girl was anklet deep in a life of crime and deceit.
Ugh! Now I felt the guilt of my sin. I still could not bear to tell my mom the truth of the twinkie heist, and so I prayed for forgiveness and hoped that Jamie thought she mistakingly ate her twinkie.
I often think back to poor Jamie and wonder what happened to her. I hope this wasn't the beginning of the end of her selfless acts of kindness and compassion. I hope she didn't develop an eating disorder out of fear of never having enough. I hope the teacher believed her at the end of the day when she said she lost her twinkie and was saving it for her mom and could she please have another? I hope Jamie was able to connect with future desk mates and that she did not develop a deep seeded distrust of humanity that would end sadly and tragically on a water tower later.
I'm so sorry Jamie! If you're ever in the area please stop by. I have a whole box of twinkies that I can't seem to eat.
My bet is that many of us share similar stories of youthful wrongdoing :) When we're young we don't always make the right decisions, driven more by our emotions and desires (and sweet things are always the most desirable!)....but in our defense, I've read that the part of our brain responsible for good decision-making does not really develop until our late teens and doesn't mature until our late twenties....
ReplyDeleteThe best thing to do is to forgive yourself and maybe try to teach your kids a lesson based on your own experience....who knows, it might work!
Lori,
ReplyDeleteI forgive you.
Julie